by Hannah from India,

This is a guest blog by Hannah Pandian from India. Hannah is a former South North Volunteer who lived at the Volunteershouse from June 2018 to November 2019 and worked at the Department for Ecumenism / Referat Ökumene in the Church of Dortmund.

29th November 2019, after a day full of packing, trying to hold on to as much memories as I can and with a very heavy heart I stepped into Dirk’s car. Bid bye to the Volunteershouse one last time. The clouds were gloomy on our way to the Frankfurt Airport and half way though it started to rain and I remember Rachel telling me “Germany doesn’t want to let you go, that’s why the skies are pouring”.

As I bid farewell, I couldn’t just hold my tears back, I hugged every one a little tighter and said to myself “You will meet them again, I promise”. As I checked in my baggage and waited for my flight, then came the most devastating news: my plane was cancelled due to technical issues, the next possible flight was only after 48 hours. My worst nightmare had begun!

What would I do for the next 48 hours? Shall I go back to Dortmund? But my visa expires in two days!! Could I get a change of clothes? At least the food in the hotel is good! Buried deep in all my thoughts, I then realized maybe Germany actually doesn’t want me to go back home.

After the worst flight experience of my life I finally came home and everything was fine for the first two weeks, then came the challenges. I thought going back home would be just like before and nothing would change but in fact a lot had changed and I myself had changed for that matter. I was not the same person; I was adapting to the cultural changes yet again.

I’ve picked up a lot of habits from Germany. I was never a person who could eat food without spices but now I am satisfied with salt and pepper. Being punctual is something I picked up in Germany and I never seem to get rid of it. Some other habits which my other Indian friends find weird are wearing shoes all the time because in Chennai its 30 degrees most of the time and it makes no sense to wear shoes all day. One more habit is the ability to talk about the quality and taste of potatoes which most of my family and friends never seem to understand, to them potatoes taste the same always and I strongly disagree!

In the last three months I have become very strong and independent is what I feel, there was this incident where I was supposed to apply for my learners license a day before my appointment I received a call from the office and along with the documents I was asked to take, I was also asked to wear a Chudithar ( A traditional Indian Dress). I knew that this wasn’t in the rule book and I asked the lady on the phone “ Do boys also have to wear a traditional dress” the lady said “ No, this was only expected from the girls” and she also added if girls don’t wear a chudithar the license would be denied.

I was super frustrated, and knew that this was never the rule. I was irritated to know such a male chauvinistic Government office existed right next to my house, I at once knew I had to break the chain. I went there the next day with a T shirt of Mary saying “THE FUTURE IS FEMALE” and I got my learners license and so are my experiences in Chennai, I look forward to every adventure and Experience in Life and I dare to be who I really am.