by Dika from Germany

Decided to go to Germany following the south-north volunteer program from UEM. It was a big decision at the age of 22 for me. I am a fresh graduate who just graduated from Faculty of Architecture and Design Duta Wacana Christian University Yogyakarta, Indonesia. Life is always about choice, and this time I chose to go far by flying using a plane that felt like a time machine. travel for approximately 15 hours from Indonesia and break the 5 hour time difference with Indonesia. I could have chosen to stay in Indonesia and find work according to my hobby in the field of Architecture. It will be very pleasant to work according to hobbies and get paid.

But it wasn’t the choice I made, going far for me was a small step to look for new perspectives and interpret things differently. Because in every trip, wherever it is always provides learning. Life for me is not only about doing what we like, but also about trying new things and finding out about the meaning of life that we have.

I live and be educated with Javanese culture (one of the tribes in Indonesia), in Javanese cultural teachings in our family, there is a culture of „ewuh pekewuh“, which is often interpreted as lip service or fear of offending others (express feeling indirect). In this culture, we are taught to live in harmony with others and try not to hurt the feelings of others. But in reality, I myself often mistakenly practice this culture, and often lie to myself and shape my person who always tries to always accept and adapt in the face of a conflict / problem. In the end it made me become burdened because a lot of harboured emotions.

After 26 days I was in Germany, to a distant country and had a different culture than in Indonesia. I have to adapt in order to survive here. Here many people express their feelings directly and spontaneously. For example, like elementary school children who are on my placement (OGS), Dortmund. When there is a small child who does not like the word/ conduct of his friend, then the another child spontaneously says „don’t do it! I don’t like it”. So that his friends knew that what he did was not liked by his friend, and he had to stop doing it. Then after that, they keep playing together and just like no one feelings gets hurt.

I used to express my feelings indirectly, and I have to live among people who often express their feelings directly. But that actually changes my perspective in expressing feelings, which is about my own culture (Javanese culture), where the „ewuh pekewuh“ culture is intended not only keeps the feelings of others from being hurt, but also keeps the feelings of ourselves from being hurt. By expressing feelings directly, with respect, more honestly and in a polite manner. Because that helps us to understand each other, without confusion/misunderstanding.

But it wasn’t the choice I made, going far for me was a small step to look for new perspectives and interpret things differently. Because in every trip, wherever it is always provides learning. Life for me is not only about doing what we like, but also about trying new things and finding out about the meaning of life that we have.

I live and be educated with Javanese culture (one of the tribes in Indonesia), in Javanese cultural teachings in our family, there is a culture of „ewuh pekewuh“, which is often interpreted as lip service or fear of offending others (express feeling indirect). In this culture, we are taught to live in harmony with others and try not to hurt the feelings of others. But in reality, I myself often mistakenly practice this culture, and often lie to myself and shape my person who always tries to always accept and adapt in the face of a conflict / problem. In the end it made me become burdened because a lot of harboured emotions.

After 26 days I was in Germany, to a distant country and had a different culture than in Indonesia. I have to adapt in order to survive here. Here many people express their feelings directly and spontaneously. For example, like elementary school children who are on my placement (OGS), Dortmund. When there is a small child who does not like the word/ conduct of his friend, then the another child spontaneously says „don’t do it! I don’t like it”. So that his friends knew that what he did was not liked by his friend, and he had to stop doing it. Then after that, they keep playing together and just like no one feelings gets hurt.

I used to express my feelings indirectly, and I have to live among people who often express their feelings directly. But that actually changes my perspective in expressing feelings, which is about my own culture (Javanese culture), where the „ewuh pekewuh“ culture is intended not only keeps the feelings of others from being hurt, but also keeps the feelings of ourselves from being hurt. By expressing feelings directly, with respect, more honestly and in a polite manner. Because that helps us to understand each other, without confusion/misunderstanding.